Dear Candid World,
but more specifically, Christians,
and
even more specifically, Catholics,
Generally, people do not support something that they believe
is wrong, evil, or morally degrading.
Think about this. Those who support gay marriage are
fighting for equality, dignity, and the pursuit of happiness. They will defend
the bullied, and fight to the end for justice. All these virtues and desires are good and they
fight for goodness.
Once, after posting an article on a fb friend’s wall, (which
non threateningly explained the basis of the Christian stance on gay marriage,)
I asked him why he believed what he believed about Gay Marriage. Then a third party
commented. He called Natural Law BS and let me know that I am a hater, (all the
while spewing F-bombs and expressing how much he hated me.) I do not usually
engage in controversial issues on social media, and sat wide eyed and petrified
for twenty minutes. My mind was trying to wrap itself around such an irrational,
non-sequitur post, (him hating me does not give an explanation for his beliefs…).
Then with a bruised heart, (I was offended, it was a really rude post) I sat for
another twenty minutes trying to decide how to respond.
1) I knew I
did not need to respond to his hateful comments about the Church, or myself.
2) Arguing
rationally with him about morals and life would be pointless as he rejected the
existence of Natural Law.
3) I had to
respond, because I could not let an attack on my fundamental beliefs (on social media) be left undefended, or
unanswered, meaning there needed to be some appropriate response.
Honestly, I prayed, “Jesus how am I supposed to respond to
this?” Then I recalled a friend of the same faith as mine who had mentioned
casually how she had cohabited in the past. I explained to her why it was scandalous, but
she did not understand. At that moment I realized that most people don’t choose
to do things that they think are wrong. And then I found a response.
·
I focused
on his person: “I bet you are a really nice person to meet.”
·
I gave
him a chance to respond differently: “but it is hard to tell that from your
post, perhaps you want to rephrase that?”
·
I focused
on his virtue: “I can see you care a lot about what you believe. We need
more people like that these days. I admire that virtue in you.”
The third party, reluctantly apologized, with the sentiment that
he did not regret his post but acknowledged mine. And he agreed. “I am a nice
person to meet.”
In a private message, my fb friend explained how conservatism
and natural law had been forced down his throat by his parents, and how his
family rejected him unless he consented to those beliefs.
This person, had been deeply wounded. When he need Love, he received
rejection, despite his parent’s intentions. His post was merely an expression
of that honest anger and pain.
This unique individual taught me that in respecting the
dignity of a person, one must see past their beliefs, and even beyond their words
or actions. He taught me that one way to show Love to another is to show them
who they really are as a person, loved infinitely by God.
